On The Road Again

A few thoughts after spending spending 20 odd hours in a car driving to the east coast and home again . . .

Why are there mile upon mile of construction zones yet little construction going on?

Why does it cost almost $5 just to enter the Pennsylvania turnpike from the west. Then another $13 to leave the turnpike and head south to an expressway that's free. If I were a tourist with limited means, I'd avoid Pennsylvania altogether.

For nearly five years a hundred and fifty years ago, the union forces tried to march on Richmond and the confederate forces tried to do the same to Washington. Neither was successful. Nowadays it takes less than two hours to cover that same distance via I-95 and probably the same number of people do it in a day than fought in the Civil War. Very crowded.

Do NOT try to navigate the beltway around Washington DC without a good map. Even though we've been there before, this time when the beltway split into three while I was heading south to Alexandria, I had no idea which road to take to get to Alexandria which is where we wanted to go.

One option was to take I-95 south towards Richmond, another was to take I-395 into Washington and the third was to take I-95 north towards Baltimore. I chose I-395 first. Nope. Then I-95 south. Wrong again. I-95 north to Baltimore sounded like I was going back the way I came.

So we exited the beltway and used our car compass, dead reckoning and a gas station attendant to find Alexandria. (By the way, the correct answer WAS I-95 north to Baltimore).

I can't expect my wife Wendy to share driving. She can't drive in bright sun, rain, fog, wind, etc. But her excuse this time took me by surprise. She said a comment I made about some stupid talk radio program made her laugh so hard she cried. And the acid from her tears made her eyes burn so now she couldn't drive.

Hmmmm, I don't know. I don't even think my lampooning a radio talk show host was even that funny. He was making up wild hypothetical questions, then asking folks to call in for discussion.

My question was better than his, I thought. "An alien lands his flying saucer in your backyard and asks to use your bathroom. Do you let him? The number is 555-7479."

Not that funny, right? But it got her out of a turn at the wheel so I guess she had the last laugh anyway.