Thursday, February 09, 2006

Report to Shareholder

While ego-surfing "Big Dave" on Google recently, I came across a site that assigns blogshares to blogs including mine. Yes, Big Dave's Blog has gone public. Wow! Nobody told me. Isn't the CEO always the last to know? Ask ex-Enron CEO Ken Lay.

I even have a shareholder: Matt Given. Why he bought shares in my blog I don't know. I hope he didn't pay real money because my ambitions have been minimal of late.

Still, I thought I owed something to Matt for his loyalty this past, well, month it looks like. So I convened an executive board meeting (actually, it was just me, but I don't want to shake the faith of potential investors). I thought about composing an agenda but since I've never been to a stockholder's meeting, I don't know if they have agendas. So I decided to wing it.

I considered a proposal to go to the annual Blogcon convention in Las Vegas, but I'm about as likely to get there on a flying pig as I am on a heavier-than-gravity jumbo jet. Yeah, I know it's tough to have your top executive afraid to fly but what are you going to do.

So then I thought about buying a new computer with high-speed internet capability, but I already have two dinosaurs, of which only one is internet capable. And I'm not using that one to type this here. So what does that tell you? I don't embrace new technology particularly well. In fact, I'd trade both my newer computers for a working Commodore-64, since I have oodles of old C-64 games. I'd have so much fun playing those, I probably wouldn't blog at all. (Hmmmmmm, strike this last paragraph from the official minutes)

Okay, how about trying to sell ads and stuff . . . you know, try to make my blog a more commercial enterprise. But then I see that other bloggers aren't making a pile of money either, and they're light years ahead of me in material, technology and fan appeal. So nix the idea of making money for now.

Maybe I could write more blogs than my two-a-week now. However, that would mean I'd run out of material sooner. Also, I couldn't do my share of the household chores, my wife would divorce me, and I'd probably have to move to a trailer park in East Lansing. It'd be like Bill Gates being forced financially to move Microsoft into an abandoned steel mill near Pittsburgh. Wouldn't thrill investors.

I could lay off employees, which usually helps to convince Wall Street you're serious about keeping the wealth with the fat cat shareholders and executives. But there's just me. And I blog for free anyway.

About all I can offer is maybe an annual dividend. I'm willing to go, mmmmmm, one percent of annual earnings. So far the only anticipated earnings are those I'll get from Matt for his purchase of my stock. So as soon as I get that money from you, Matt, I'll return your one percent.

Meeting adjourned for lunch at Carl's Chop House. Matt, do you have credit cards?


Blogger Bernadette said...

A trailer park in East Lansing would be moving up, Dave!

7:27 PM  
Blogger Peter said...

I 'm disappointed Dave, I fully expected the first comment to be from Matt, I don't know what I expected him to say, I just thought he should be here.

11:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

are you on the NYSE yet?

6:27 AM  
Blogger Big Dave T said...

PETER--I put a comment on Matt's blog to let him know I did a blog on this. I'm hoping he will stop by too. But Matt's not a prolific blogger. The last blog he uploaded was on January 26th. So he may not notice my comment right away.

6:35 AM  
Blogger bornfool said...

I checked it out and it looks to me like matt owns 50% of the shares. You could have a power struggle on your hands.

8:35 AM  
Blogger Fred said...

Sounds like Matt has set up a shell company for the sole purporse of buying blogs. I'm going to adapt a poison pill offense for my blog; I don't want a hostile takeover.

2:08 PM  
Blogger poopie said...

I totally forgot my shareholder's name. I'm afraid I'm a very baaaad blogger ;)

3:21 PM  
Anonymous vicki said...

Already boondoggling at Carl's...I'm sure Matt will be paying for his investment soon-unless he's in the futures market.

So listen, Dave. You need to come to Vegas. I'm not kidding. I'll hold your hand inflight (no hanky panky- I know, I know, your family reads your blog). Please come. We'll print up shirts that say, "I'm with Hoss." I've never been, never wanted to go, but hey! if I can get on the plane so can you.

3:50 PM  
Anonymous Melissa said...

I am a long time BlogShares player. I found out about it when I had my Hunny Hive site. It is fun for a couple of days and that it gets boring. I play maybe once a month or so.

6:00 PM  
Blogger Merle said...

Dave ~~ Thanks for your visit to Herons Nest. It is strange how we often get the same message from different places. I have noticed this too. Quit that talk of NOT living as long as our parents.
Plan on doing better. Look at the fun start we had!! Cheers

10:58 PM  
Blogger Deb said...

Well Dave. . .er, I mean Mr. Dave, sir. I'm very impressed. Watch out Donald, here comes Dave!

9:27 AM  
Anonymous Maria said...

Wow, this gives me a whole new afternoon of research. It was fun to see my site under the linked to ones. Off to find out more.

4:10 PM  
Blogger schnoodlepooh said...

Count me in. I'll buy a share of stock in Big Dave's Blog. I like to be in on the beginning of a big thing and you look like the future to me. You can stay with the two blogs a week. You have me beat by one. You've done your Report to Shareholder. It looks like you're good-to-go!

11:24 PM  
Blogger 1 Blog Given said...

Well it seems that my little investment has garnered some interest. I would love to join you for a nice meal. Unfortunately my credit cards are maxed from buying blog stocks, so if you have that 1% ready...

12:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


12:45 AM  

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