Death's Door

When I was in high school, my buddy Bob confided to me that he had figured out a way to cheat death. A big movie buff as well as someone concerned about his "eternal dirt nap", Bob had determined after watching numerous westerns that those mortally wounded seemed to be able to ward off the end long enough to say their last words to those gathered around.

It was as if their sheer clenched-teeth determination made the difference between life and death, Bob thought. So all Bob had to do was fight off dying for however long it took, just like they did in those westerns. Eventually, like a fever, death would relent and Bob could continue living as before.

Of course, the Hollywood-style of the ultimate fade-to-black is nothing like real life. Er, real death rather. While surfing the far realms of my digital TV channel line-up, I came across the movie, “Dying at Grace.” This Canadian-made documentary follows the final weeks, days, hours and minutes in the lives of five terminally ill patients in the palliative care ward at Grace Health Centre in Toronto. And records their deaths.

Most suffered from some form of advanced cancer. Though all accepted their fate, a few continued to cling to the hope of at least a few better days. One woman talked about moving out of the hospital into her own apartment if her latest bout of chemotherapy brought about a remission. It didn’t. Instead it sent her into a downward spiral that brought her to death’s doorway just as quickly as the other terminally ill patients featured in the movie.

Since I still correspond via e-mail with Bob, I had to give him a brief synopsis of the movie. In fact, death in real life is nothing like it’s portrayed in the movies, I explained. At least, in westerns. Death could be more like what you might see in a horror movie, I told him. And I told him why. While Bob knows now that he can't cheat death, he still becomes a bit anxious on the subject of death and dying.

Here’s how Bob responded:

“Damn, just when I thought this post couldn't get any worse you go totally morbid on me. No thanks on the movie; I've never wondered what death actually looked like. Of course, you probably have the Definitive DVD Collection of Faces of Death too. Damn Christopher Coffin, this is getting creepy. Sharing (medical issues) is one thing but I fail to see the audience value in watching people pass. Just Ghoulish, Dave Kevorkian, just ghoulish. BTW, some people like mystery. You should have included a spoiler alert with this post. I know some people like to read the end of a book first but most of us would prefer not to have the ending spoiled! And you a budding O. Henry should have known most readers like the strange, unexpected twists at the end.”

Sorry Bob. I'll be more careful with my movie critiques in the future.